By now you have probably realized I have run away from home. I just couldn’t take being abandoned day after day in that cold, dark, break room.
Also, the coffee machine kept making fun of me.
So I ran away.
The first thing I did is get myself made over at a tattoo parlor.
What do you think about my new tricked out look dad?
Next I went to Newark Airport so I could fly to Europe and go busking across the country.
But they racially profiled me because I was black and wouldn’t let me on the plane.
So I took a bus into New York City
And watched a taping of Letterman from the best seat in the house
Then I got depressed and went to the Empire State Building and thought about jumping and ending it all…
…but that’s when I met her.
We took a bus to Vegas…
…and got married by Elvis!!!!
I’m so happy I may never come home....
